Talkin' 'bout Your Generation

Is the Greatest Generation really that great? Are the Boomers a joke? DoMillennialssuck? Finally, your definitive guide to defending or attacking any age group

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h yes, that time-tested ever­green, trundled out at holiday parties, family gatherings and pretty much anytime the alcohol starts flowing: "My generation is [glow­ing superlatives here]. Your generation is [insult here]." The argument is inevitable, considering the oceans of time and complexities of circum­stance separating each epoch. After all, Grandpa may have checked out at Omaha Beach, but he certainly never checked in on Foursquare. Still, there's one truth that binds us all: Whether you're a member of the Greatest Generation, the Silent Generation, the Baby Boomers or the Gen Xers, Yers or Zers, you must understand the defining characteristics of each in order to issue an informed verbal beat-down. That's where we come in.

THE GREATEST GENERATION

<3oto 1901-1924

HEROES

• John F. Kennedy, Julia Child, Jackie

Robinson, Walt Disney, Margaret Mead,

Frank Sinatra, John Wayne, Jack Kerouac,

Charles Lindbergh, Louis Armstrong,

Betty Friedan, Jonas Salk, Ronald Reagan

VILLAINS

• Richard Nixon, Joseph McCarthy, John

Dillinger, Meyer Lansky, Bugsy Siegel,

Joseph Bonanno, Leona Helmsley, Charles

Keating Jr., Ronald Reagan

WHAT THEY'RE KNOWN FOR

• Character forged on the breadlines of

the Great Depression, bravery tested via

drop-kicking Hitler to the great hereafter,

ingenuity demonstrated while build­

ing America into the greatest country on

earth—in the midst of the Cold War, no less.

Did we mention frugality, personal respon­

sibility and humility? Well, those too.

WHAT WE THINK OF THEM

• "It is, I believe, the greatest generation

any society has ever produced," writes

newsman Tom Brokaw in his aptly titled

best-seller The Greatest Generation. They

fought "not for fame and recognition but

because it was the right thing to do."

WHAT THEY'D RATHER YOU NOT KNOW

• According to polls conducted as late as

the 1990s, the Greatest Generation might

not have been as great as previously thought. The majority of them opposed interracial marriage, objected to the prolif­eration of working mothers and supported discrimination based on sexual orientation.

SHINING EXAMPLE

• Like many of his peers, Ted Williams

walked away from baseball, at the height

of his powers, when his country needed

him. Was one war enough for Williams?

Hell, no. He served as a Marines fighter

pilot in World War II and went back for

seconds during the Korean War. "He was

a marine just like the rest of us, and he did

a great job," said fellow soldier and future

astronaut John Glenn. "Everybody tries to

make a hero out of me," added Williams

with characteristic modesty some 39 mis­

sions and one hearing impairment later. "I

was no hero. There were maybe 75 pilots

in our two squadrons, and 99 percent of

them did a better job than I did."

NOT-SO-SHINING EXAMPLE

• Like absolutely none of his peers, Richard

Nixon resigned the presidency for his role

in the Watergate conspiracy—a scandal

involving wiretapping, robbery, hush money

and so much more that served as a public-

image wrecking ball to American politics.

BOTTOM LINE

• Somehow brave and bigoted, progres­

sive and regressive.

THE SILENT GENERATION

<3oto, 1925-1945

HEROES *

• Martin Luther King Jr., Elvis Presley, Hugh Hefner, Jackie

Kennedy, Bob Dylan, Muhammad Ali, Marilyn Monroe, James

Dean, Malcolm X, Gloria Steinem, Warren Buffett, Andy Warhol,

Clint Eastwood, Maya Angelou, Jim Morrison, Cesar Chavez

VILLAINS

• Charles Manson, Lee Harvey Oswald, James Earl Ray, John

Gotti, Jerry Sandusky, Bernie Madoff, Jim Jones, John Wayne

Gacy, Dick Cheney, Ivan Boesky, Pat Robertson, Ted Kaczynski

WHAT THEY'RE KNOWN FOR

• Baby Boomers carried the torch for racial and sexual equal­

ity, but the Silent Generation sparked the match, giving birth

to the leaders who got everyone marching to the promised

land in the first place. And though Boomers happily take

credit for making rock and roll "classic," it's the Silent Gener­

ation who plugged in and brought the blues-infused monster

to life in the first place.

WHAT WE THINK OF THEM

• We don't. After all, they're not called "silent" for nothing.

Born into the depths of the Depression, raised hard by a

world war and made paranoid by anticommunist fever, the

Silent Generation grew up, according to a 1951 Time maga­

zine cover story, "withdrawn" and "cautious," seen and not

heard. (Being sandwiched between the history-book heroics

of the Greatest Generation and the larger-than-life'legacy of

the Boomers didn't help.)

WHAT THEY'D RATHER YOU NOT KNOW

• Sure, they walked to school...uphill...in the snow...both

ways. But their tales of hard rearing (which have come to be

referred to as "old-school") mask upbringings in the most sta­

ble families in U.S. history. Plus, they were the first generation

to-have unprecedented access to higher education, funded by veterans benefits earned during a time of minimal bloodshed.

SHINING EXAMPLE

• Perhaps no single1 American has brought his country closer

to realizing its democratic dream than Martin Luther King Jr.

In a few short years, the engine of the civil rights movement

helped deliver his generatioJi, and all those to follow, from the

Jim Crow dark ages into the very real promise of justice for all.

NOT-SO-SHINING EXAMPLE

• Never short on uninformed commentary, televangelist Pat

Robertson has made something of a second career offering

his opinion on lifestyles other than his own. To wit: "Many of

those people involved in Adolf Hitler were Satanists. Many

were homosexuals. The two things seem to go together."

Naturally he's had plenty to say about feminism: "a social­

ist, antifamily political movement that encourages women to

leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft,

destroy capitalism and become lesbians."

BOTTOM LINE

• Shattered but sheltered. Seeking a different way and a bet­ter quality of life without fully recognizing their role in either.

BABY BOOMERS

&&ui 1946-1964

HEROES

• Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, Bill

Clinton, Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama,

Michael Jackson, Bill Gates, George

Clooney, Bruce Springsteen, Michael

Jordan, David Letterman, Tom Hanks,

Magic Johnson, Madonna

VILLAINS

• O.J. Simpson, Donald Trump, Karl

Rove, Sarah Palin, Jay Leno, Michael

Moore, John Edwards, Rush Limbaugh, Mel Gibson, Kathie Lee Gifford, Michael Milken

WHAT THEY'RE KNOWN FOR

• Powered by 40 percent of the U.S. population, Boomers changed the face of popular culture like no generation before or since—its movies and music, its cars and clothes, its power and politics. Taking up the cause for peace, love and

understanding, they made a dean break with the past. Better yet, they did it against a backdrop of unprecedented chemical and sexual experimentation. And half a century later, they won't let us forget it.

WHAT WE THINK OF THEM

• It depends on whom you ask. Accord­

ing to a 2009 poll, 27 percent of people

surveyed said Baby Boomers would

be remembered for challenging an

unjust war and changing social values.

Another 42 percent claimed they would

be remembered for rampant consumer­

ism and self-indulgence. The rest simply

weren't sure or chose "nothing at all."

(We're fairly certain all of them pon­

dered the same question: Why won't this

generation just shut up already?)

WHAT THEY'D RATHER YOU NOTKNOW

• A generation once defined by its

unflinching idealism became equally

noted for its narcissism and epic self-

indulgence. Before long, the Me

Generation, as they became known, had

turned drug use into drug abuse, given

us disco, tried to get rich on junk bonds

and handed an unholy national debt

to their children. And they're still not

done: By 2030, social welfare will buckle

under the strain of one in five Americans

reaching his or her conclusion.

SHINING EXAMPLE

• Seeing Steve Jobs's name on a definitive

list of the 20 most influential Americans

of all time—alongside the likes of George

Washington, Albert Einstein and Thomas

Edison—should come as no surprise.

Who else so completely changed the way

we live our lives? Before his death at 56,

Apple's founder revolutionized not only

personal computing but also the wireless,

music and film industries. And we had

the feeling he was just getting started.

NOT-SO-SHINING EXAMPLE

• Gordon Gekko, the character who

claims "greed is good" in the 1980s

capitalism-on-steroids classic Wall Street,

is, the filmmakers admitted, partly

based on Michael Milken. At his peak,

Milken earned between $200 million

and $550 million a year by bankrolling

mergers and acquisitions with junk bonds.

Since doing time for securities fraud,

ponying up $600 million in fines and

being diagnosed with prostate cancer, he

has turned his moneymaking mind to the

treatment of cancer and other diseases. If

he funds a cure, we'll call it even.

BOTTOM LINE

• Apparently there is an / in team.

GENERATION X